Today is Sunday. I was ecstatic. Finally, one more day has passed. Like yesterday, it’s supposed to be difficult. I woke up with growling on my stomach. It wasn’t a good feeling. Then I forgot that I was fasting, I got up as quickly as always. It got me dizzy and I had to go back down to sit on my bed. How stupid haha I literally warned people about it yesterday and I still did it.
I continued today as usual, the difference, today was raining. It was very cold I could actually feel my finger being like ice. I don’t know if it’s the fasting or what. I’ve never remembered a day in Bali can be this cold.
Today was tough. I drank less water. I couldn’t even shove 8 glasses of water inside my body. It wasn’t a good feeling at all. I almost threw up whenever I drank. Good thing I couldn’t do anything so I didn’t sweat. Although it was very boring. I spent my day watching movies without eating. It was an enormous change. I didn’t know I could do this haha.
The night was difficult. There was a piece of cake on the table. Oh my.. I know I was not hungry but I still crave food. I wanted to eat that. I figured out, it would melt in my mouth and I could enjoy every bit of it. Especially it’s been my first day. Then the closer I got to the cake, the more my body resist. The sweet sensation became disgusting in my head as I suddely saw myself being very fast eating that food. I decided not to eat the cake. I refused to be fat. I did it! I did good. I am very proud of myself. Having this kind of event is important for my progress. I have the urge to eat but I can control eat. I feel so good.
My mood was a little bit unstable. It was up down up down hahaha I almost yelled at most people I came in contact with. I didn’t say it’s easy. Oh! I also warned them in advance. It was one of many things that made me go further from people. It’s only for 720 hours anyway. I followed my dream and my heart. I really want to have my ideal weight again.
I disregard anyone that tell me the risk of water fasting. Today someone actually pissed me off by telling me what to do. I don’t know. Was it really me who get pissed or what? I was finally able to change my habit. I am happy. One thing people should concern about me is how I am actually doing, how much progress I have achieved and how am I feeling. What is so difficult about it?
I am not stupid. I am doing it for myself. I don’t need any help at this moment. I know people make joke about this. Life is made of decisions. I also don’t want to stand on the other side of the road. I don’t want to die or to be sick. I did my research. I am doing this with full conciousness and I am very careful. Please stop worrying. I know what I am doing.
I am actually a little bit afraid too. More warnings are not making things any better. I need this fasting. People can be more supportive. The word death is actually a little bit too strong to be said to me. What if you’re sick and you try to get better but instead I tell you, you are going to die! When you believe the thing that you do actually makes you better. How would you feel? It’s not gonna be good, right? Stop doing that!
I hope you can focus less at other people’s business and focus more on yourself. I believe you also have something else to do. You also have your own problem. Do yourself first. I know you want to help, please do it the right way. You can feel good without making people feel crappy about themself. Do you know that? Hahaha.. Be Wise.